“Bitches Don’t Know What They Want”: On Unsolicited Dick Offers And Misogynoir

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Published NOV 8, 2017, Wear Your Voice Magazine

Let’s be clear: I paid three dollars and a hug for street harassment. Or assault. I still don’t know what to call it. I do know that I didn’t want it and felt forced to consent to it.

As a genderqueer woman, I’m often taken by surprise by the unsolicited interest of men. As a black, cis-gender woman, I am surprised by my surprise. In his 1999 comedy special Bigger and Blacker, Chris Rock joked (because men are privileged to joke about rape and hebephilia) that, “every woman [in here] since [they] were thirteen, every man they met has been trying to fuck [them].” Of course, most women know, depending on their development the depravity of their assailant, that age can go much lower.